Skip to main content

My Friend and I

Do you have a "friend" that is so special to you --- that you can tell them anything?  Do you have a "friend" so close to you that you can pour your breaking heart out to them and feel the comfort of just letting go?  Do you have a "friend" that you can tell your deepest secrets to and know they will never be told again?  Do you have a "friend" who you can express your greatest joys to and know the world will never know?

Well ...I hope all of you have a "friend" like the above.  I really think, in this world we all need someone we can confide in.  Or maybe a place you can go to just relax and be yourself.  I have had a "friend" like this for sometime now and this post is celebrating a "milestone" we have reached together.

In May of 2014 I walked into Office Max and bought myself a plain writing tablet.  It had wide lines and the pages were attached at the top instead of the side.  In that tablet were one hundred empty pages.  I also bought a pack of pens.  The cheapest I could get.  When the cashier rang them up and told me it would be some $10.00 ---I never dreamed --I had just bought "my best friend".  That those empty pages would teach me so many important lessons about myself and life.

The reason for the "milestone" celebration is this:  I have just wrote my last story...my last feelings..in that old "fiend" of mine and have folded its covers to be stored away.  It has been by my side every day for six months. If you would walk into our living room , you would see it laying there on the coffee table...sometimes open, sometimes closed.  A pen beside it or on top...ready for a hand to pick it up and start to write.

It was my companion, sometimes in the middle of the day, sometimes early in the morning, sometimes late at night when all was quiet and asleep.  It was always there for me when something was troubling me...or my heart was breaking...or I was so overjoyed with Gods beauty.  Words would come pouring out into that old "friend"  Sometimes it just sat there. Open on the table...because my heart was not singing---and it just waited.

There has been joy coming from some of its pages, and some pages were wet with tears before I had completed them. I have wrote about my dreams and my fears there between its covers.  Some of those pages I have shared with you---and some are so deep and so personal they will never be shared.

On those pages I have wrote all about the beauties that surround me on our little farm...nestled down along our little creek.  Sometimes I share memories of childhood or our first days together as we started farming---the funny and the sad.  By writing there, I have been able to change my negative world into a positive one.  I now can see beauty in everything around me.  I love to listen to a song, or lift my face to the sun.  I love to walk hand in hand with my husband, down a moonlit road, or watch him with a new born calf.  I love to watch the grandchildren jump in the stock tank full of water, or look into their little faces full of laughter and giggles.  I love walking alone through the pasture or set under the old tree smelling new mowed alfalfa.  I see memories jumping everywhere out in the "north 40" among the weeds and tall grasses.  I love all of this---but most of all I love to set curled up in my old chair---pen in hand---putting on paper words to tell all about my beautiful, wonderful life as a mother and farmwife.

So...dear "friend"...with a mixture of joy and sadness...I fold your covers together...take a pen and write save on your face and place you in my box of unforgettable treasurers.  I will be visiting you from time to time, just like you do to a friend who means the world to you.  Thank you for helping me find happiness in my heart.  Thank you for adding meaning to my life.

I open the cover of a new tablet...pick up my pen once more.  On those empty pages before me ...I once again paint a picture that will hopefully help to color our world in love, hope, smiles, sunshine and thankfulness for each sunrise and sunset we are privileged to share together.

I love all of you. 





Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Chapter 21 Move Over----We're Coming

It was the last week in January and the building was complete. It sat just north and east of our house. Goodness, compared to our current little metal farrowing huts, we appeared to really be in business. It measured 24 x 80 and was brown in color with a white roof. Two grain bins sat at the north side. One held grain for the farrowing and one for the nursery. An auger tube ran from the bin into the building so you could fill your buckets inside. There was a large pit at the end where all the goody would go for storage. Inside, fourteen crates sat on top of slatted flooring. Seven on each side, with a wide aisle down the middle and an aisle behind each row of crates. At the end of the middle aisle was the door into the nursery. Four large pens lined both sides back there with feeders and automatic waters in each pen. This was where the baby pigs would come at three weeks to be weaned from momma. Everything about this building was brand new. There was a very important reason for that!...

The Heart Buds {Current}

She rocked back and forth there on the deck as the sun sank lower in the western skies. It had been one of those days that she was so happy to be alive. So happy to let her heart fly free in the warm breeze. She sat there wondering...what was happening to her? She had changed somehow. Oh yes she will forever be a farmers wife. She will always love the feel of wind in her hair, sunshine on her face, raindrops dripping off her nose. She will forever love to sit among the pasture grass on a warm summers night, and watch as the sun turns the western sky to oranges and golds. Or raise her face to let the moonbeams dance all around her, or thrill to the call of the coyote. She will always love the simple country life. She always loved the springtime on the farm. She loved to watch as tiny little buds popped out on a tree limb. She loved to see the pear trees spread their white cloud of blossoms against the dark blue sky. She loved to kneel there in the flower beds, take her hand and wipe...

Chapter 18 His First Big Step

I sat on a little chair there in the kindergarten room. Bret stood as close to me as he could get, curiously looking from one side of the room to the other. On my lap sat Kate, playing with my purse handle as she watched Mrs Miller move around her desk. We had come to visit with Mrs Miller. She would be Bret's teacher in about two weeks. Mrs Miller was an older lady and so very gentle. Her room was very colorful. There was an area where all colors of blocks sat in little containers. There was a larger area where a big chair sat in front and all around were books. I could picture little Bret sitting there with his friends, cross legged on the floor, all eyes on Mrs. Miller as she read them their favorite books. I was sure Bret would enjoy his days there with her and all his little friends. As we visited, Bret moved slowly away from me and cautiously around the room exploring here and there, but little Kate sat stuck to my lap. A few days later, Bret, Kate and I went to Wa...