Just Over The Threshold

Sometimes the deepest, heartfelt lessons are learned at the bedside of your dear gray haired friend. At the bedside of someone who is far wiser that yourself. At the bedside of someone who has loved you like a daughter. This is my story.

Those three little words "I love you" are so small but yet so strong, so beautiful. They are as beautiful as God Himself. They can go deep into the human heart, softening every part and changing you for always. Those three little words can bring you pure sunshine, especially if they are whispered into your ear by a dear friend.

I have regrets. I have very deep regrets. They tear deep at my soul, my heart. You see when my own father, my dear husband's mother, and a small number of my other dear friends were in the hospital, I could not go to them. I have never stepped my foot into a hospital room. I just couldn't. I couldn't because my heart was not willing to trust. So I will forever live with regrets. I will forever wish I could of held my dear father, my husband's dear mother, and those dear friends and whispered those little words into their ears. As I look back I will, in my minds eye and in my heart, always hold those sweet gray haired friends close to me.

God prepares the heart. He knows when it's time. He knows what is needed to prepare a person for the beauty of acceptance. It will forever be a miracle to me as I watch God's handy work, but it is more of a miracle to see the work done in my own heart. If there is anything I am thankful for, it is for the beauty of love.

Five weeks ago, I couldn't stay away any longer. It was as if something invisible was pulling at my heart strings. I had to leave my comfort zone. I was ready to walk over the threshold.

 As I walked into the nursing home room, my heart filled to the top with love. Laying in bed was our dear gray haired friend. Setting beside her husband in her little wheelchair was his sweet, gentle wife.

As I made my way to his bedside and sat down gently beside him, I bent down and my cheek touched his soft warm one. That is when I heard those words come softly into my ear. "I love you so much." My heart just filled clear up with love. I just sat there looking into those kind, gentle, tired eyes.

I than got up and went to his dear wife. I threw my arms around her neck and once again I heard those words "I love you." I just stood there for a little bit holding this precious little gray haired lady. On that beautiful morning, in that nursing home room, I learned what "love" can do to the heart.

True love never questions. It can't. If your heart is full of genuine love for someone you will trust them. You give them your heart. How can you question God's love? It is true. It is genuine.

True love will bring two hearts together and they will become as one. When two hearts love one another, they beat together. They need each other.

True love intercedes for another. Love has the power to look beyond the faults of another. True love... loves the soul.

True love is powerful, but soft and gentle.

True love will willingly give and give, until it has nothing more to give.

True love is a refuge. Its strong arms that hold you tight and lets the tears fall unbidden from your soul, as you walk through the storm. Sometimes you reach for those arms, but there are none...that is when God reaches down His arms and holds you close to His heart.

True love sees beauty in all things.

True love is satisfied. It don't look for another.

Sometimes love will come to you at the costly sacrifice of another. Love is to be respected. It is a gift to you. A very beautiful, costly gift sometimes. Never throw love away.

True love can bring tears. Deep, sobbing tears from the depth of the soul. Tears that shake your whole body. True love can cause tears because the heart is tender---very tender. Sometimes your heart is breaking and you sob. You reach for someone but your arms are empty.

I use to be afraid of tears. I didn't want them. That is why for most of my life, my heart laid unwilling in my chest. It was not willing to trust. I have found out that sometimes my greatest lessons are learned alone with my tears. With every tear that drops into my heart, it makes a soft spot, for true love to grow deeper and stronger.

Some of my deepest tears have fallen for someone else's hurt---someone else's pain. With each tear that drops my love and compassion goes deep into my very soul.

Love waited for me...just over the threshold. I am forever grateful. I am forever humbled.